I have hopeless faith in what we used to be
Sometimes I think I can swear I can see
The truth in why what we had died
Honestly there are so many tears I've cried
I fell for you, but it wasn't the same
Unlike my past loves it wasn't a game
My exes always used to take with no shame
They never did stake their claim
It was different with you than it was with all the rest
It really seemed like you were the best
The good thing to keep me in line
Our love seemed so divine
When we broke up there was a part of me that died
I've been trying so hard to get that part revived
There was a goodness in me that was showing through when I was loving you
How could I be so stupid as to let that become askew
I still regret everything I said that fateful day
Man how I wish I could have crushed my damned desire to stray
The thing is I'm not over it
Not even close yet
Honestly I don't want to forget
I don't want to let go
Of all the love I have for you
No, I want to fix what we had so that it's never again askew
I want you forever
Unfortunately, I'll have you never
You don't love me anymore
Not the way you did before
Certainly not the way I love you
I guess now I have to pay my due
The price for letting you go
And for telling you no
In that moment what I needed most was your love for me
And for saying no that love will never again be
I got scared and I pushed you away
I never wanted our love to sway
I just wanted you to see past the happy mask to the suffering girl inside
You know, the one I always like to hide
I'm sorry that I pushed you away
With you has always been where I wanted to stay
I hate myself for losing you
Now there is nothing I can do
I pushed you too far and too long
Now the reality is, you're gone
I'm alone now, like I was before
Before that day that you knocked on my hearts door
I willingly gave you the key
Cause I thought you would always stay with me
You knocked down my walls
That kept me apart from so many, and you let me fall
But I lost my chance
I fell alone
I'm still falling in an endless dance
I really want to see you smile
It's been such a long while
I'll never get so lucky as to have you
So moving on is what I have to do
But I can't
Because, Nick, I can't stop loving you
And I never want to