Ok so here's how it is... I'm not gonna be able to love someone for a very long time... :(  At least not until I'm more positive happy and over Jonathan.... Sigh... If you're reading this and you know what i'm going through then please someone comment!  I am so sick of just seeing no comment on every single post!  I'm dying for human interaction right now!  Sigh... I need a friend that can sympathize with what I'm going through instead of being bluntly honest and making it worse for me all the way around... Sigh... I don't know how I can even go on but I know that I have to and for me to do that requires focus on something other than Jonathan... I have honestly never loved someone as much as I loved him and now I'm regretting it big time.   But I'm moving on letting go and getting over him because all he cares about is being free I wouldn't recommend dating someone two years younger than you while your still a teenager heck not until you're like 24 and I'm saying this to girls because guys weather you want to admit it at not you develop slower then we do and when your say 14 your developed to the point of being 12... There you go Marcia can be bluntly honest too.  Sigh... Good night friend or foe ex or not. I'm sure he has checked this out once or twice he's probably very curious since I've told him all of the posts are about him which is true pretty much... So Jonathan if you are reading this good night and goodbye I'm fine now but... Never mind you have lots of explaining to do and by no means does me moving on mean you are off the hook... Sweet dreams.